Ode to Bantam 15

Well, we had a birthday back in May...

But we didn't have a good picture of him, since he got his braces off in February...and Mama Hen was barely keeping her head above water to finish out the school year afloat...Bantam19 was accepted at college and we had a graduation....

...and today, he left.  For two weeks at camp.  Back to Honey Rock, where he went last year--quite against his will--but where he had a great experience anyway.  (A rebellious Blondechick came home from the same camp last year saying, "Okay, I get it--I see why I need Christian friends and why you want to switch me to the Christian school.")  This year, although he's been increasingly bummed to discover that he's going to miss out on all the major events of his summer--his good Christian friends have big plans for the 4th of July and for this Christian rock festival--his tune changed as we were packing his bags, and at the church picnic on Sunday, and he sounded pretty psyched to go, now that the time had actually come.

This young man has grown so much over the past year.  Physically, he's added so many inches that most folks don't believe he's not in high school yet, and one of his newest activities is working out, so he's added a little muscle all around as well.  He has always enjoyed running, and he's become quite disciplined about getting in his run, his workout and his guitar practice every day.  Academically, his first year at the private Christian school (that is known for its homework load) was quite a challenge for him, but he showed a dogged determination to keep up, and was rewarded with more A's than any other grade, to his surprise and gratification.  Spiritually, he is growing as well, asking questions, participating in church and Sunday School, manifesting fruits of the Spirit along with all the teenage instabilities.  (For example, he can be quick to lose his temper, but he's just as quick to ask forgiveness and start over.)  He is a favorite as a babysitter, because not only does he play with the kids so that they love him to come, but he always does dishes and even puts away laundry, so the mom loves him to come as well!

So I'm missin' my boy already.  I'm praying for his safety at camp.  I'm praying for a counselor who can really mentor him, friends who will encourage him in all the important ways, challenges that will build him up, and most of all, for encounters with the true and living God.  I pray that his spiritual hearing will be attuned to God's voice, that he'll learn how to hear with his spiritual ears, this boy who loves music so much, for whom listening is such a frequent activity--may he listen and hear during this time, and come home hungry to hear more from his Master, Creator and Friend.

...We have not stopped praying for you and asking God to fill you with the knowledge of his will through all spiritual wisdom and understanding. And we pray this in order that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and may please him in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God, being strengthened with all power according to his glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience, and joyfully giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance.... in the kingdom of light.  (Colossians 1:9-12)

[Help us settle a friendly family discussion: Which photo above do you like better, and why?]

Capturing the Memories

Although today is officially the first day of summer, we've been busy with summer activities for several weeks now!

We started out the season with a week of soccer/basketball camp in the mornings for Chicklet7 and Bantam5, and afternoons for Bantam11.  At the end, everyone got a participation award, but Chicklet7 also earned the Outstanding Shooter award for making the most baskets of any K-5th grader, boy or girl.  She also was given the Best Offensive Player award in soccer.  "She's really aggressive!" her coaches commented, to our surprise and Blondechick's delight, since that's what everyone says about her as a player.

B5 also was given an award of distinction; he earned the Most Improved Player for soccer.  This award was less surprising, however, since on the first day it was all the coaches could do to get him to stop dribbling the ball with his hands. 

In swimming lessons, which started up the next week, he had a better first day.  He ended up as the youngest child in Chicklet's 6-7 year old class, since the 4-5 age group was full, and I was hoping he'd be okay.  Turns out he was the only child that was swimming by the end of the first lesson!  Chicklet was so proud of him.

That same week, we went to Six Flags Great America with some other friends from church.  Without enough free passes to go around, I ended up buying season passes for myself and Bantam19, since it made more sense to buy them for the adults in our party.  So I am now the proud owner of a season pass to Great America!  I figure we'll go four times this summer, on the four weeks that you can "bring a friend for free."  One of them was this week, so we went again today, just B19, myself, Chicklet7 and B5.  Next time, in August, B15 will come with us and bring B11 for free; in the meantime, B15 has gotten his money's worth, and then some, out of the pass he bought for himself a month ago, along with all his best friends.  Living only 25 minutes away is pretty nice!

But the memory I wanted to capture was when I told the younger two that we were going to Great America, and Chicklet excitedly said, "I can't wait to go on the American Eagle!"  I responded, "Oh, no, honey, that's the one that you were so scared on last time."  (She had cried and screamed the whole way.)  "I know!" she replied, eyes sparkling.

(Must be her aggressive streak.  And when she rode it this year, she was fine.  She loved it!)

This morning, we drove to a nearby church for Vacation Bible School, and B5 was a little hesitant going in to the unfamiliar building.  "Will you stay there?" he asked, concern registering in his young voice.  "Yes, I'll stay for a few minutes," I said.  I watched him find a seat among the large class of kindergarteners, near a little friend of his, then get up and form a line to head to the church sanctuary for the opening time.  I walked near him in the hall, then said, "Well, I think I'll go now."  Without looking at me, he said, "See ya, Mom" with as much unconcern as though he were just heading out to our back yard.  My baby is a big boy now!

Yesterday, for Father's Day, I spoke with my dad on the phone, but spent the afternoon/evening with Papa Rooster's family--his parents, brother, our sister-in-law and niece--at his brother's home on the north side of Chicago.  It was a picture-perfect afternoon in their lovely little back yard, which my sister-in-law has landscaped with love and a great eye, where Musician Brother grills the most succulent steaks.  We sat outside and listened to recordings of Dad, made in the 60's when he was in his thirties and in full voice, singing songs from popular musicals of the day.  Musician Brother danced with his mother, while Papa Rooster took pictures, and Bantam15 sat around with the adults and listened to the old stories, and it was a perfect day.

And today we bought our friend's 2002 Kia Optima.  Tomorrow the dealer will begin the needed repairs, and maybe on Wednesday, Blondechick will have herself a car!

Driving Dilemmas

Monday was the long-awaited day--the date we registered for 11 weeks ago, when both Bantam19 and Blondechick17 would take their road tests!  Prior to the big day, I had done my homework to learn what it would do to our insurance rates to have two teenage drivers in the house.  The answer was:  Yikes!

So with all our uncertainties about whether Bantam19 will really be safe on the road, I questioned whether we should even let him take his road test.  But since we'd have to wait so long to reschedule it, and we knew it would be really demoralizing to him if he didn't even get his chance...we prayed that if he shouldn't be driving, that he wouldn't pass.

But he DID!  They both did, with flying colors!

I had also learned that if he has a license, we have to have insurance coverage on him--but if he's not, we don't, and the road test results are good for a year.  He can cash them in any time for a license, if he were to get a job, for example, or if some other pressing reason arose.

So for now, we have deferred the decision.  He is disappointed, but compensated somewhat by the passing score on his test and the knowledge that he can have a license any day--if he gets a job and can help pay for the insurance.  Blondechick, on the other hand, has two jobs, starting Friday!  She is hostessing at a busy restaurant--20-25 hours a week, they said--and also, a nearby mom with her own business needs babysitting for her three young children, at least two days a week, whenever BC gets a day off from the other job.  She's going to be busy this summer!

So our next driving decision is about a car for her.  Right now she's driving our 15-passenger van--a safe choice if she's in an accident, but it's a bear to drive, park--and buy gas for.  So we're looking for something safe and cheap, to make her the primary driver on, with liability coverage only.  A friend has a 2002 Kia Optima for sale, very affordable, but we'd need to put money into it--we're taking it in to a Kia dealer next week to find out how much.  Or would we be better off with an older Honda Civic?  Or Ford Focus--or Taurus?  Or a Nissa Altima?  Websites abound with recommendations.  How about safety vs. cost?  Insurance costs vs. repair/maintenance bills?

What we need is something safe, reliable, fuel-efficient, with lots of miles left on it, that costs next to nothing.  (Got that, Lord?)  We're eager to see what/when/how He will provide!

(And a job for B19 with that, too, God--that's not far from home, without too many driving challenges enroute.  If it's a good idea....)

Watching for His answers!

(And interested in your recommendations/comments, if you have them!)

Congratulations, Bantam19!

Look at that young man.  See that half-smile, the hands fingering his diploma?  He's pleased.  He's proud of himself.  He's filled with wonderment and barely-believing.

From the minute he entered the auditorium, one of nearly 500 in his class, I felt a lump in my throat.  I'm sure it's normal to feel emotional as a parent at a graduation--it's the end of an era, after all, and a launching into the unknown future--but what I felt was something different than I imagine most parents around me were experiencing.  I kept thinking back to his diagnosis of autism at age 4, when he was barely able to put words together into a sentence, when he couldn't answer a question or count or understand a childish joke.  

How far he has come!

If you had told me then that he would graduate from one of the largest high schools in Wisconsin along with all of the "normal" kids...well, I might not have believed you.  I might not like to be told how the book ended either:  The journey itself has been such an experience of faith, trust, and watching God work in our lives--more than we could ask or imagine!

We had over 50 guests at his open house, including all four grandparents.  (These are my parents, who were able to stay for the ceremony as well.)

And the story continues with the next exciting chapter:  Trinity College in the fall!  We got the news of his acceptance just three days before his graduation--perfect timing to share the news with family and friends at his open house.  Thank you to those who prayed! (Why did we choose Trinity?)

My heart feels at rest.  I am filled with joy and thankfulness!

B19, this is my prayer for you, from Ephesians 3:16-21:

I pray that out of God's glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your heart through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. 

Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.