Thursday, December 10, 2009

Lament

I miss writing. I miss quiet hours late at night when I collect my thoughts and put them together in a coherent order, simultaneously keeping friends and family updated on our lives, keeping a family journal and satisfying that urge to order words.

Why can't I find or make that time anymore?

Everything has changed with 2/3 of our kids in school, now. You would think I'd have more time for myself, but you would be wrong! I no longer have much control over my schedule--I have to get up by 7:30 every morning to get Chicklet off on the bus, and even earlier if it's my morning to take the carpool to Blondechick and B14's school. (Thank heaven B18 gets himself off--he's earliest of all, catching a 6:11 bus each morning.) So I'm just too tired to have much creative energy at the end of the day, as I used to have when I could sleep in a bit more.

Also, my older kids have so much homework that they are often still up and underfoot, if not demanding my help, at 10:30 or 11:00 at night, and there's nothing like studying for history tests or solving inequalities to start me yawning!

During the day, you would think I'd be able to get Bantam10 set up with his schoolwork and work nearby on my laptop, and you'd be right. But my theater group job plus church business and relationships generate a lot of emails which consume much of that time, and also performing chores that the kids used to do when they were homeschooled.

And appointments! It seems like every week we have several. Between the family doctor, the orthodontist and the dentist, we always have something, and this week, we had an urgent care visit for stitches (B14 tripped with scissors in one hand and sliced open a finger on his other hand) and Blondechick learned from the oral surgeon that she's going to have her wisdom teeth out over Christmas break. Even my car had several appointments after I was rear-ended in October, with the claims adjustor and a couple of auto body repair places. Oh, and now Blondechick has driver's ed every night for 3 weeks.

Is it any wonder that I haven't done any Christmas shopping yet? Or that Bantam10 is behind in his math book? (Okay, he's ahead in his math book. But he's behind my expectation of where he could/should be!) Or written a long-overdue update on our church?

I miss blogging. Perhaps I should experiment with short and sweet. We'll see what life allows!

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

I would love to hear about your church. Start there! Many short and sweets are fine.

Amy said...

I'm so glad you wrote! I've been wondering how you all are. I think often of your church and what God is doing in your midst. I too would love an update when you get a chance! I hope to find time over RJ's break to rethink our semester to find more time to write (and exercise and clean and bake and...) myself. Blessings to you this Advent.
Amy

Amy said...

As much as I've made fun of Twitter, the 140-character "posts" do have a certain appeal when one's time is not one's own (she says, nursing one child and listening to the other count slices of french toast).

Dionna said...

Hang in there. Maybe you'll find moments to carve out writing time soon.